Letting go is all good, until you miss out

people doing marathon
Photo by Snapwire on Pexels.com

I’ve written before about my experiment this year — cutting way back on running mileage in favor of cultivating a daily Ashtanga practice and dedicating time to Ashtanga study and teacher training.

I will have a year-end report! But I recently opted out of a regular running event and it felt rather weird.

Since the Mankato Marathon and related races started in 2010, I’ve always done either the marathon or half-marathon (with the exception of 2012 when my niece got married that weekend). This year, knowing that I was running less, I thought I’d run the 10K to still do something and be involved.

I didn’t pre-register, knowing that it would be easy to register the day before. Or, as it turns out, easy to NOT register.

The week before the 10K was shaping up to be one of my busiest weeks of the semester. A lot of early mornings — rolling out of bed and immediately getting in the car to go to various destinations. A lot of late nights — writing, music, yoga. The thought of getting up early, once more, on a day where I really DIDN’T have to get up early — well, I wasn’t liking that thought.

So I decided to not run that day and guess what — I slept in until 8 a.m., something I haven’t done fore months. My body and mind needed it. I had a lovely morning and overall, just a lovely, relaxing day.

But I did have feelings of missing out, especially when I saw all the social media posts. I felt a little like a wuss — really, I couldn’t get up one more morning of the week? I couldn’t dig deep and get it done?

I could have, but I didn’t want to. As I get older, I know my limits. I know when I’m bleeding out energy all week in terms of teaching, I need to find ways to get it back. After an intense week of being with people, I couldn’t stomach the thought of race-day crowds.

Learning to “let go” is a relatively new concept for me. In our Western culture we are not encouraged to “let go” and take care of ourselves, lest it be seen as a weakness. I know people who view the world as a competition for who is busiest and who can get the least amount of sleep. I will let them duke it out — I’m not going to play that game.

Do you “let go”? Is it something you continue to work on? What choices have you made?

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